Don’t dress to be in with the fad
Mite as well wear some plastic plaid
A candy-striped suit would be nice
Along with some Fuzzy-wuzzy hanging dice
Wear an offensive goatee — shock the crowd
Shave your ugly head — they’ll surely bow
Doesn’t matter what kind of shoes you wear
Generic, or the Puma, or the Nike ‘Airs’
Jeans are the same, the styles come and go
Levi’s, Wranglers, Jordache, they all work, you know
Pay for the comfort, pay for the newest style
Some of the things I see cause me to throw up bile
You Got the pouffe in your hair — it sticks up in the air
Why do we do it? No one knows
But we all love to see the fashion shows
Girls wear the skirts that barely cover their hips
They got the right lipstick for their lips
The jeans were baggy with patches on them
Now they are tight, so you can see in

“And now for the evening news: Bob Salter”
“Today, the Federal Government spent six
hundred billion dollars on fashion products
for Congress and the White House. President
John Doe now uses ‘Rave’ Brand Hair products,
and wears Gitano jeans. And of course the
national fashion indicator for this week says
that Nike ‘Airs’ are the shoes to wear. Next
week laws will be passed designating exactly
what is cool and what is not.”

Fashion Frenzy! (repeat 100x)