“It was the worst case of suicide I ever saw...”
Shot through the forehead with a Colt .45
In the bathtub with a toaster, but still alive
The tub fell from the very top floor
Sixty stories, maybe less, maybe more
Dropped into the river that flowed below
Tied in the tub, anchored with bricks, sinking low
But tides run deep and the river was high
Washed up on a bridge, still waiting to die
Climbed out of the tub and hid behind
Wait for a bus or truck, if they would be so kind
Armored car from one way, limo from the other
Jump in front of one, and bounce off another
Landing on an ax that he’d planted the day before
Then, rolling off the bridge, the waiting noose held him above the shore
It was then that he fingered the bombs strapped to his chest
Deciding that a big blast would end it best...
“Later, we found his car idling in his locked garage, the brake lines cut,
with a note on the windshield...
The note said, ‘had a bad day’.”